Steven Wright #14:

I went to the museum where they had all the heads and arms from the statues that are in all the other museums.

I like to go to art museums and name the untitled paintings like "Boy with a Pail" and "Kitten on Fire".

I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time". So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.

I went to this restaurant last night that was set up like a big buffet in the shape of a Ouija board. You'd think about what kind of food you want, and the table would move across the floor to it.

I went to a general store. They wouldn't sell me anything specifically.