From January 2013 Readers Digest, submitted by M. Wisnewski:
Intentionally bad first lines from nonexistent novels, from the annual Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest:
Tucked in a dim corner of Th Ample Bounty Bar & Grille, Alice welcomed the fervent touch of the mysterious stranger's experienced hands because she had not been this close with a man in an achingly long time and, quivering breathlessly, began to think that this could be the beginning of something real, something forever, and not just a one-time encounter with a good Samaritan who was skilled t the Heimlich Maneuver.
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