I bought a house on a one-way, dead-end road. I don't know how I got there.
I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house. I also bought some batteries, but they weren't included. So I had to buy them again.
My house is made of balsa wood, so when I want to scare the neighborhood kids I lift it over my head and tell them to get out of my yard or I'll throw it at them.
The other night I came home late and tried to unlock my house with my car keys. I started the house up. So, I drove it around for a while. I was speeding and a cop pulled me over. He asked where I lived. I said, "Right here, officer." Later, I parked it on the freeway, got out, and yelled at all the cars, "Get out of my driveway!"
My house is on the median strip of a highway. You don't really notice, except I have the leave the driveway doing 60 MPH.
No comments:
Post a Comment