Doggone it!

Readers Digest, April 2013, All in a Dy's Work, from newsposstleader.co.uk:

Every year, the RSPCA - the British equivalent of the ASPCA - fields a lot of odd phone calls from distressed animal lovers. Here are a few:

• A citizen called to report a slow-moving tortoise on the shoulder of a motorway. It turned out to be a deflated football.
• Someone reported that a seagull was looking sad because it was sitting in the rain.
• A caller asked if we could remove a spider from her bathroom sink.