My theory of evolution is that Darwin was adopted.
Someone sent me a postcard picture of the earth. On the back it said "Wish you were here"
Cross country skiing is great if you live in a small country.
I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.
"Did you sleep well?" "No, I made a oouple of mistakes."
My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby. Sometimes she has to cancel the rest of the afternoon's appointments.
My socks DO match. They are the same thickness.
Officer, I know I was going faster than 55 MPH, but I wasn't gong to be on the road an hour.
I have two very rare photographs: (1) A picture of Houdini locking his keys in his car (2) A rare photograph of Norman Rockwell beating up a child.
I stayed up all night playing poker with Tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died.
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